Posts in 'twitter' – Page 8

Dear Windows Update: Could you fix your platform so I don't have to run update a billion times to get things up to date? Thanks. Love, Me

List of petty things ordered by administration supposedly due to shutdown: http://t.co/0k8Cam8x5p // Verbose & repetitive but interesting.

I think I've said it before, but: I used to think Clinton was a bad president, but the longer Obama is in office the more I miss Clinton.

Just told my wife I'm too much man for one woman. Only because of obesity, though. #wouldbefunnierifitwasnottrue

RT @SenSanders The shutdown was planned and paid for by the Koch brothers. // If it was paid for why are federal employees furloughed? #ha

"Federal Bureau of Investigation switchboard, how may I direct your call?" {click} // Sure, it's longer than normal, but if we all do it...

Idea! To combat scammers, we should all answer our phones as either the FBI or Microsoft. They'll get scared and hangup. Can't miss! #win

A scammer told me what he was doing was okay because I was a rich American and he was poor. Must have been a Democrat. #zing

@EricDSnider FWIW, it was not performed at the two concerts I've attended in the last couple of years (Utah State Fair and Wendover).

Androzene male enhancement ad on TV claims maximum stamina & enhancement. I think that's too much responsibility. I'll pass, thanks.